Motherhood Has Made Me Nicer

I can barely believe I am going to admit this, but it's true. Motherhood has made me a nicer person. While I was pregnant, I had the suspicion that I was becoming nicer, and after having my daughter, I knew it was true. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that while I was pregnant, people showered me with kindness and it was just infectious.

But it goes deeper than the kindness of friends, family and complete strangers. Something within me shifted. I looked at people differently, with more compassion, and suddenly wanted to give complements to people where before I might not have. I wanted to do things for people to make them smile--that sort of thing. It's not that I wasn't nice before or anything...I think I was, but there was always a bit of a edge to me that seems to be breaking down more these days.

Last week I was having a visit with my mom and I asked her if she thought I was different since becoming a mother. She, without hesitation, said, "I think you're nicer." I started to laugh and I said, "I think you're right!!!" I should clarify that I remember somewhere in my teen years being like this; more emotional, compassionate, and overall just having a more open heart. I'm so thankful to finding this part of myself again.

Maybe it was the experience of birth itself. To be frank, it's so much more than the birth of a child. For me, it was the rebirth of my own soul. Pushed to the physical peak, I was forced to face my fears and I was confronted with a reality of love I never knew existed. I don't necessarily mean the love for my child, which is itself an overwhelming feeling, but more so the love of the people who supported me during the birthing process (my husband, mom, mother-in-law, and friend Jenn). The people who were there for me in those moments gave me a gift that I hope, over a lifetime, I can repay.

All of these things have made me a more humble person which, in turn, I think makes me nicer. I'm sure that there are more gifts that parenthood has in store for me, but this one is surprising. I figured I would come out more jaded, honestly. I haven't lost my sense of sarcasm, of course, or my dark sense of humor, but I am different nonetheless and kinder version of my former self. Or I suppose you could say I am more of my former self way back before adulthood caused a slight shift in character.

I know that this may not be the experience of every mother...but I'm thankful to realize it as my own experience. And certainly, there are those who are childless who are born with an innate kindness in their souls that just bubbles over. What is your experience? Has a life circumstance made you more kind, less kind or revealed something about you to yourself that was profound? Share in the comment section below! 

No comments:

Post a Comment