What Does A SAHM Do All Day?

When I became a mother, I didn't really have a lot of expectations. I thought that I would maybe work from home some, but other than that I wasn't really sure. And then she was born. At first I freaked the fuck out about work thinking that I should be working more. Then I panicked because I didn't actually feel this big desire to work (despite myself); I just wanted to hang out with my baby. What did that mean, I wondered? Finally, I moved into acceptance that even though I work from home here and there, I'm basically a stay at home mom (SAHM).

Once I grasped the realization of being a SAHM, I ran with it in my own quiet way. I was excited to find a new routine--one that worked for me and my baby. That in and of itself was a task. Slowly we fell into a morning routine, a napping routine, and even a workout routine (where applicable.) This all, of course, is subject to change at any moment given what is happening developmentally, or just in our daily schedule. 

Still, even though I had grasped that I was, in fact, a SAHM on a personal level, I had yet to shout it from the rooftops because a part of me felt ashamed. I know. I shouldn't be ashamed. I should be elated, and I am elated. It's a wonderful thing I can do for myself, my family and my child. But I am also very type A. I can do a million things at once. Currently, I am keeping an eye on my daughter, doing laundry and texting with my sister-in-law. Sometimes I think that I am falling into the feminism catch 22. Our predecessors wanted the right to have any lives they wanted, and now we can do it all.

The thing is, I don't WANT to do all of it. I just want some of it. I have written about this before, but it's never been more true in such a personal way. Sure, I am capable. I am smart. I'm not just going to sit around and sing kids songs for the rest of my days (not that there is anything wrong with that.) But all things at once? Ugh, no thanks. This is now. And now is good.

My days are full and they go by so fast. It's true what they say about babies--they grow up really quickly. And I enjoy it watching it. Even on days when it's crazy. Or messy. Or just plain upsetting. I think we have a need to over analyze. Or at least, I know that I do. I want to think about what I could be doing better, or smarter or more of. Our society breeds this type of thinking on many levels; tells us to do more and have more, be more productive. Some of that is good.

And sometimes you just have to be happy with what you have and not question if there is more. That is sort of what being a SAHM has taught me. I don't have to question or analyze each day, I only have to bask in the now and appreciate this precious time for what it is. It's different than any other experience I have had in my life, and it's wonderful. 

The question of what a SAHM does all day is one that we moms will periodically be confronted with. What we do is take care of our children. It's not relaxing, it's more than full time, and it's fleeting. It's a privilege that should be afforded to more people because I believe that they would relish it. What it's not is something to be ashamed of, or something you should be uncomfortable with. I'm lucky to have come to that quickly because it allows me more time to enjoy myself with daughter.

So how do you feel? Are you a reluctant but happy SAHM like me or was it always your calling? Do you work and feel satisfied with that? Share with me in the comments section below! 

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