I love the movie, “Love Story” as much as the next romantic gal...and the famous line, “Love means never having to say you're sorry” has a certain ring to it. Made more eloquent, of course, by the fact that the main character is dying.
If I was going to define this phrase further I would add on “when you are dying” to it. Love means never having to say you’re sorry... when you’re dying.
When you are living, though, being in love means having to say you are sorry, and sometimes a heck of a lot. We’re human. We screw up, we make mistakes, and we [hopefully] learn from them. In the meantime, though, when you love someone, sometimes you just have to cop to it with a meaningful apology.
This romantic line about not having to apologize leaves too much room for bad behavior that people can then brush off and not apologize for. It’s like these sayings....ones like “love is pain” or “love hurts” and all that jazz. It’s not lost on me that sometimes love hits rough patches, or that at times life itself becomes a bit unbearable, but love itself is none of these things.
Call me crazy, I am more the “love is patient, love is kind” type of gal. Love means saying you sorry, love means change, and while sometimes change comes with struggle, love--at the end of the day--is what makes all that nonsense worth it. Love may be worth the fight, as they say, but at the end of said fight, I want an apology.
We all screw up--even the most kind among us have a way of getting downright nasty at times. It’s okay to be imperfect. Sometimes our love spews nasty moments on other people, and that is precisely why I feel apologies are in order.
Let’s keep is simple when it comes to love. When you do something wrong, take steps to make it right. Generally the apology won’t be all that is required; you might need to change an action or think a little deeper, but an apology is a darn good place to start.
But I want your help. Give me some of your thoughts about love and ways that we can improve our communication when it comes to screwing up, getting and giving apologies, and generally living with the people we love. Leave it in the comments section below!